


Happy Birthday Lil Bro!

by woonghwi



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Birthday Sex, Hand Jobs, M/M, lots of emotions, very brief kwj mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:54:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26682517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woonghwi/pseuds/woonghwi
Summary: It's Felix's birthday, and Chan knows what he wants. It's risky, but maybe they can find some middle ground...
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix
Comments: 7
Kudos: 182





	Happy Birthday Lil Bro!

"Happy birthday lil bro!" Chan grins wide as he enters the room, immediately walking up to Felix on his bed and falling over the younger boy. Felix laughs and tries to push him off, but all Chan does is fall slightly to the side. It's the night of his birthday, and Felix spent the whole day celebrating with the members, with Stays on V Live... He was only now taking some time to himself. 

Chan is the only person he'd want to interrupt that. 

Both boys sit up, Felix's legs under the covers still and Chan moving to match. Felix moves right in, wrapping his arms around Chan's waist and resting his head against him. Chan hugs him too in return, the two cuddling close. 

Chan is just about to ask how Felix's birthday was, if he enjoyed it, but Felix speaks first. "This is my best birthday present," he says in Korean with a small laugh. 

"What, a hug?" Chan asks back in English once again, also laughing now. 

"From you? Yeah~" Felix snuggles in closer. They stay like this for a moment, before Felix pulls out of the embrace. "Actually," Felix says, his tone more serious now, "can we... talk?" 

Chan raises an eyebrow, a little nervous at what he could mean. "Yeah, is everything okay?" He briefly wonders if he could have been thinking more about Woojin again lately, hearing him in the news again. This is a hard topic for both of them, so maybe Felix needs to vent a little. 

This isn't at all what Felix wants to talk about. 

"Yeah, everything's fine," Felix reassures him first. "I had a really good birthday, honest. But... something's been on my mind." The younger boy looks away from Chan's gaze. He looks... nervous? 

"I know we've sort of talked about it before, but... have you... ever wanted more? Between us...?" He looks back at Chan to see his reaction. 

He's a bit taken off guard, but he doesn't look upset by the question. Chan sighs softly. "I mean... yeah. You know that. But... it's just not safe, is it?" He wants to be with Felix more than anything, but they decided long ago it just couldn't happen for them. 

"I don't know... I mean, neither of us want to risk anything, our careers mean too much, and I get that... but is it really a risk if it's... just us, here, alone in our room?" They do share it with Changbin, sure, but he's out for the evening Felix made sure of it. 

"I... I don't know..." Chan is thoroughly conflicted. He sighs, looking to the door as he thinks. 

Felix catches the trajectory of his gaze and, without a word, gets up off the bed and goes to lock the door. When he returns he gives a playful, "See? Easy." Felix sits back on the end of the bed, this time across from Chan, facing him. 

Chan hesitates, pauses a moment. He needs to think there isn't any risk to this now, is there? A lot of their other members are also gay or bi too, and they all knew it... even without saying he's pretty sure most, if not all of them, had picked up on them liking each other too. So what exactly is the risk they've been trying to avoid? Just their managers, who won't come into a locked bedroom late at night anyway. They know what they can find that way in a dorm full of repressed young boys. They know better. So what if the two if them just... help each other with that sometimes? 

Chan swallows the lump in his throat, then leans in and kisses Felix right on the lips. This isn't at all their first kiss, they'd stolen a good number or others in the past just before deciding it was too risky to continue. They'd even made out a couple times, but always got too nervous to go too far. 

So, understandably, Felix doesn't get too excited too fast. He loves the kiss of course, he always loves the feeling of Chan's lips, but he doesn't really know what this means yet either. A couple more kisses, maybe some tongue, maybe Chan's hand on his upper thigh if he's lucky? 

When Chan speaks again, this time it's in Korean. "What do you want most for your birthday?" he asks. He already knows the answer.

"You." 

Exactly. So Chan leans in as he kisses him again, pushing Felix by the shoulder lightly, urging him to lie back on the bed. He wastes no time in doing so and before he knows it the older boy is directly on top of him. They hadn't been like this much before outside of non-erotic play wrestling and such, so even just being able to look up at him like this gets Felix's heart to race. 

His hands fly to Chan's neck and pull him down into a long string of kisses. He doesn't know how far Chan will go with him today, but he doesn't want to hesitate and lose that chance. 

After some more needy kisses and a bit of swirling their tongues around together, Chan is the first to pull back. 

"You're sure you want this?" Chan asks, back in English again. 

"W-want what exactly?" comes the shocked reply. Felix  _ wants _ that, he has for a while but is Chan really willing to give it to him? 

"Not that...!" Chan says with an incredulous laugh. "But... something similar? Something... partway?" Chan isn't sure either on just what he wants to do yet. 

"Please," Felix sighs. "I want you. You know I do..." He's not even shy at saying this he knows they've both made it more than clear over the years. 

Chan nods, smiling as he leans down into another kiss. He slowly lowers his hips, and when their bodies meet, even without a physical arousal from either of them quite yet, it earns a tandem gasp from them both. 

Their kisses break, and Felix grins wide, with just a hint of mischief.  _ This is good. _

Chan takes a deep breath he can't believe they're actually doing this. But again he grinds his hips down, and again, Felix's hands finding their way to grip the back of his shirt. Felix's face grows red as their bodies continue to touch, so quickly flushed with arousal. 

"Channie..." he interrupts at one point, both of them starting to grow hard into the sensations. 

Chan stops his hips immediately, worrying he's gone too far, worrying Felix is having thoughts of regret. 

Felix looks up to him with nervous eyes and says softly, "I-I'm a virgin..." 

Chan sighs with relief. "That's it?" 

Felix pouts and nods. 

"First off, I'm... really not planning on that," Chan says. He knows they both want to, but that's a line he can't cross at least not yet. 

"I know. I know, but I just... I don't want you to be upset because I... don't know what I'm doing." 

"Don't worry about that," Chan says, slipping in one line of Korean before switching back to English. "Just... relax. It's your birthday. I'm going to treat you. Just tell me if anything changes, okay? If anything is too much or you change your mind or... anything." He knows how nervous he was for his first time, so even if they're not actually going to have sex here, he understands. He doesn't want there to be any pressure right now, just love. 

Felix nods, a hand moving to Chan's neck to pull him down into a kiss. "Trust me, I won't be stopping you," he teases. 

Chan smiles into a new string of kisses, and before they know it his lips have moved onto Felix's neck. The younger boy shifts slightly, sighs the air from his lungs with heated desperation. Chan might only be partway there after grinding on him, but Felix is already fully hard. Everything here is so new to him, and that makes it all the more intense. 

Chan gets up for a moment, off the bed and over to his dresser. Felix looks to him with curiosity, propped up on one elbow, and the older boy quickly returns with a small bottle of lube. 

"Oh?" Felix asks, a mischievous look on his face. 

"For the last time--" 

"I know, I know," Felix laughs. Chan kisses him a few more times, getting him to lie back again before he pulls his pajama pants down his hips a little ways. Not too far, but enough to expose his erection Felix rarely wore both underwear  _ and _ pants in the dorm unless they were filming something, and Chan knew this plenty well. 

The older boy opens the lube and pours just a little into his hand before setting it aside. He reaches for Felix and takes hold of him, and even just the first contact is  _ incredible. _ Felix  _ shudders _ at the feeling and has all he can do not to moan. He always thought someone else giving a handjob wouldn't feel much different from getting yourself off, but he now knows he was severely mistaken. 

He looks up at Chan with such lust in his eyes, cheeks flushed underneath his freckles as Chan begins to actually move his hand. He pumps him so slowly, with such tenderness. Felix throws his head back and bites hard on his lip to keep quiet. 

Chan feels especially victorious at how quickly Felix unravels for him it  _ really _ makes him want to go further. But how far  _ can _ they go...? He thinks a little as he strokes him, debating what his limits are. He makes sure not to fall out of focus on what's happening he wants to remember this clearly, but he also wants to make sure this is something really  _ worth _ remembering. 

After a short while of his hand stroking Felix and the younger moving his hips into it, him panting as his face is flushed and craving more, Felix places his hand on Chan's wrist, getting him to immediately stop. 

"Hyung," Felix calls softly, keeping with the Korean as he pleads, "I...  _ really _ want you inside me... Please..." 

Chan sighs, then licks his lips in thought. It's  _ so _ risky, but he truly wants to give Felix the world. He wants to do anything he asks of him, anything he could possibly come up with. But he's too nervous at the thought of them losing  _ everything _ for this. So he suggests, "What if I just... finger you...? And we can go from there? I just don't know if-- it's just so risky to do more than that..." 

Felix nods, having to agree with his reasoning. Despite how much he craves it, it's just not worth losing all they have right now. "Then do it like you mean it," he says in English with a laugh, then pulling Chan in to kiss him again. 

So before they know it Chan has lubed up two of his fingers, holding out just one to start as he looks to Felix again. "You're ready?" he asks. 

" _ Please _ ," Felix urges. He almost sounds irritated at this point with his impatience but jokingly so. 

So Chan slips the one finger in, so carefully and tenderly, and Felix gasps  _ hard _ at the feeling. 

He's never even fingered himself before. 

Chan knows enough to wait, and Felix is thankful for it. He sighs, takes a couple deep breaths, settles into it. After a moment Felix mumbles a soft, "a little more," and Chan complies. 

It elicits another gasp, as does the final push in a couple seconds after. They pause again with his finger (almost) all the way in, and Chan leans in to kiss Felix, making sure his arm doesn't move too much, doesn't change the angle. He's really  _ inside _ him... 

Felix kisses him back eagerly, and after a few of them he tries moving his hips just a little. It causes another small sound to escape him, thankfully plenty quiet so others won't hear. Chan takes this as his cue to begin moving his finger a little, starting slow. Felix pants softly, sinking into the feeling. His hand reaches for Chan's free one and their fingers lace together, Felix gently squeezing as Chan slowly slides in and out. 

Eventually Felix whispers a soft but needy, "You can use two..." He wants as much of him as he can get. 

Chan leans in for a couple more kisses before he does so. He's a little hesitant at first about the force needed, but once he does slip in, Felix seems  _ plenty _ happy about it. 

So once Felix is ready, Chan begins to really move his fingers inside him. He has a steady rhythm, going deep in before pulling a majority of the way back out. These long, slow strokes get Felix to tilt his head back, lips parting for his ragged breath. He wishes so desperately that he could only moan for Chan, that he could call his name, that he could properly express how badly he's wanted this and how badly he wants more. 

He looks pleased, but not near an orgasm which, considering it's his birthday, Chan wants to give him. If they're going to do this just once, he wants to do it right. 

When he pulls his hand out of Felix's, the younger briefly lifts his head with curiosity. But once Chan takes hold of him again, his head flies back once more, eyes and lips squeezing shut just to keep himself quiet. 

Felix's hips thrust upward into his grip, causing a sharp change in sensation on both ends. He realizes he  _ loves _ it, though, so he keeps doing it. The pleasure in him builds and builds until one point when Felix chokes out, barely still a whisper, "Y-you might want to stop... I'm-- nnh-- I'm getting close..." 

Chan looks to him, his desperate face, his eyes filled with lust and  _ love _ . He can't deny him this. He knows Felix is only warning him because he thinks he wouldn't want this, but he absolutely does. 

Chan tricks him at first, however, inadvertently. He slowly pulls his fingers out of Felix, earning another gasp, and reaches for a tissue to wipe them off. Felix thinks he's done for a second, until he grabs another tissue too and holds it over Felix's tip as he resumes stroking him, faster now. 

The younger boy's hands both grip at the sheets as his toes curl, his face contorting as he tries so desperately to hold back these sounds that want to escape his lips. 

When he gets particularly close, Chan moves in, pressing slow and messy kiss after kiss to his lips. He manages to have their lips still pressed together when Felix comes, the pressure stopping these choked moans that threaten to fill the air. 

With his heat caught in the tissue and cries caught in Chan's mouth, he's quite proud of how well they hid this. 

Felix pants, chest rising and falling, with a smile spread across his face. He looks up at Chan with his sweaty bangs sticking to his forehead, and Chan looks down at him too with just as much love. 

When Chan moves to lie down beside him, Felix catches sight of his erection, offering, "Want me to help with that too~?" He grins. 

"Not this time," Chan says with a smile. As tempting as it sounds, Felix looking to him with a playful and teasing eyebrow raise and lick of his lips, which he gently hits him for, he knows they can't push their luck any further. 

They cuddle for a few minutes, both of them, though Felix in particular, happy as can be. Of course he would have wanted more, but he understands this is for the best. He's still completely satisfied, snuggling up to the older boy with post-orgasm sleepiness. 

But Chan pulls him out of this a little and back to reality when he says, "Imagine if we could just... date. You could just... be my boyfriend." 

This gets Felix's attention, and he deems it worth sitting up for. Chan quickly mirrors this. 

"Didn't you say that--"

"I know," Chan says, "and I'm not saying we should. But I just... I want you to know that... in another life, if we didn't have so much to risk that means so much to both of us... if things were even a little different... I'd want us to be together. I don't want you to think you're alone in that..." 

"I know," Felix says, pouting a little as he looks down to the bed. He wants to add more, but his mind blanks. This is so much to think about; his heart is so heavy. 

"Maybe... maybe even in time, if things in the industry ever change... I don't know. We'll see. But until then, we're still together anyways, right?"

Felix nods, starting to tear up a little. "Can we just... kiss sometimes? We already cuddle, but... sometimes when we're alone still... is that okay?" 

Chan smiles, now tearing up too at how vulnerable Felix looks and sounds, how gently and timidly he opens his heart for him. He places his lips so softly on Felix's, trailing one kiss into many more. 

"Yeah. I think we can manage that." 

**Author's Note:**

> My first skz fic so hopefully I did well! I'm a really new stay so go easy on me hehe I just really love these two 😭 comments super appreciated!!! thank you!!


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